Have you said something to yourself like this? Maybe even recently? It can be frustrating, discouraging, and overwhelming with all that is going on in the world, our work, and our personal lives. Have you been there? Maybe you are there now? Do you feel like you’re languishing a bit? I know I have.
And, I want to let you know that it’s OK not to be OK.
I’ve been publishing a monthly-ish newsletter since 2007. However, the last one that I published was in February of 2021 – over 6 months ago. Many of my readers have recently reached out to me and asked if they had fallen off my email list because they haven’t received them. (By the way, thank you, Anita, Rick, Steven, Becky, and Jim, for doing that.)
Truth be told, I’ve been struggling with several things and unintentionally drifted away from what has always been important to me. When COVID hit, all of my speaking engagements evaporated, and my brain kept asking, “Why is this happening to me?” Then, my business declined, and I tried my best to pivot. I did as best I could at the time. I even took a contract position for a couple of months working for someone else. But, I was still thinking that “This shouldn’t be happening.”
I began to “should” on myself. I should be better, smarter, brighter, more resilient. I should have done this sooner or should not have done that at al
Slowly, with the many changes in the world, I began to lose a little hope. I desperately wanted to get back on a live stage and share my message with others. But that wasn’t/isn’t happening soon enough. As a result, I started to lose my confidence, my creativity to come up with solutions, and my resilience. And, to make matters worse (in my mind), I have taught other people for the past 15 years how to overcome these challenges, grow their confidence and courage, create value, and stay focused on becoming as well as doing. “What kind of loser can’t apply the very principles that she teaches?” These were the thoughts in my head. And thus, the slow, downward spiral began.
When unchecked or unrecognized, self-judgment and self-criticism can take you off course quickly and away from not only what you want to DO but also who you want to BE.
Amidst all of the internal turmoil, my most treasured personal relationship of the past 18 years fell apart. It seemed like I was surrounded by hurt. How can this be happening? So here I am, a person who teaches others how to create trust and build relationships, how to step into the world of other people, how to make connections, and my most important relationship crumbled. Now my brain was solidly and consistently calling me a hypocrite. It was telling me that I wasn’t OK. There must be something wrong with me.
More and more confidence drifted out of me. The reserves of resilience that I once had were gone. Have you ever experienced this? What are/were the stories that your mind is/was telling you?
This shouldn’t be happening… and yet, it is, and it did.
The good news is that it doesn’t have to stay that way. As Og Mandino says in his book, The Greatest Salesman in the World, “The tides advance. The tides recede. Winter goes, and summer comes… AII nature is a circle of moods, and I am a part of nature, and so like the tides, my moods will rise; my moods will fall.”
So, my friend, that is why it is happening. It is part of this crazy thing we call life. Yet, while nature, biology, and circumstance control so much out there, there is one thing that we all can learn to control better. And, that is what goes on in here, within our own hearts and our own minds. (Yes, I’m saying this to myself as well as you.)
And, it’s OK not to be OK. I’ve learned so much. I’ve learned that the highest highs usually follow the lowest lows. I’ve learned that we need the darkness to appreciate the light. We need solitude to appreciate companionship. And most of all, we need each other.
I used to think that I could do this alone.
I believed that a sign of maturity was independence. But, I have found out that doing it alone is incredibly difficult. As the mountain of circumstance grows higher and higher, you lose your vision. You’re no longer able to see over it or find a way around or through it. As I have leaned on terrific old friends, I have also found amazing new ones. They have lifted me up and helped me see over and around the mountain of circumstance. Through that experience, I have come to realize that mastering my own thinking is best done with a team… a team of like-minded, warm-hearted, caring friends who believe that the tides will advance again… for all of us.
So, while I am not perfect at mastering my own mind, I do still have the ability to teach folks how to get started and/or continue on their amazing journey. So, it is with an open heart that I want to personally invite you into a community of people who will help you along your way. It might not be easy, but as I have personally found out, it will be worth it.
Won’t you take the first step?
If you’d like to grow your confidence and increase your resilience, please join me on Wednesday, Sept 15th, for a LIVE web event where I will share the process with you that will help you get back to being and becoming the amazing person that you are. And who knows, you may find a few like-minded, warm-hearted, caring friends along the way.
What will you learn?
- The first and often most overlooked step in the process
- How to reclaim your power
- That it doesn’t have to be difficult
- and so much more!
Please join many other like-minded folks and me for this powerful masterclass.
Want more from Traci?
Recently, I’ve been on a couple of podcasts that you might find interesting. One that has already been published is below. The second is soon to be released. Stay tuned for even more episodes in the VERY new future.
For Project Managers and Corporate Leaders
In this episode, you will discover:
- What the three hierarchical dimensions of value are, and why they matter on every project you will ever run
- What axiology has to do with a Nobel peace prize nomination
- When a discovery phase creates or destroys value for the customer and how to go about it effectively
- How to collaborate while taking into account potential biases
For HR/OD/LD/TD Professionals & Leaders
This episode will drop on September 13, 2021, at Noon ET.
We often talk about people being the greatest asset in business and life (this is why the podcast exists!) but today we have a podcast guest who can prove it with math and science. Our podcast guest, Traci Duez, uses Axiology to mathematically prove that people hold the highest value above all else. Axiology, the study of the nature of value and valuation, can be used to measure how people think and see value. Experts like Traci can use this data to help shift how people and teams think. Thinking in a more aligned manner while holding people in the highest value means we can see the world a lot more clearly.
You won’t want to miss this episode of the HRart of It podcast as Traci and Samm discuss the math behind valuing people!